Crazy Way
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posted by Vicky Jo at 6:38 PM
Thursday, April 19, 2007
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- Name: Vicky Jo
- Location: Los Angeles, California, United States
I coach people to identify and develop their natural personality strengths in order to maximize their potential.
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- The Official MBTI[r]
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8 Comments:
I have suspected for years that it was INFPs who tended to become DID under intense stress.
An observation that I think is related to this is how my memories of tasks stay with the task, and get separated from one another so that when I am thinking of task B, often I am unaware of having forgotten about things that had occured when I was contemplating task A. It's almost as if tasks are units of memory that load into consciousness for processing and then unload when I get distracted by something else. And then later when I stumble upon evidence of the forgotten task, like finding some job left incomplete, then the memory of my work on this previous task often, but not always, comes flooding back to mind. Its this separation of memories by task that has wondered me if INFPs tended to become DID under intense stress.
Another related experience is when I cannot find something. I might look for it now and then for days or weeks without success. Many of my goals fail take longer or don't get accomplished at all because I some critical tool cannot be located. However when I give up and decide to go purchase another of the item, 90% of the time, when I go to put the new item away, I find the missing item sitting in the place that I had decided to go put away the new one. I've tried to trick myself by pretending to purchase a new item, and sometimes it works, other times not. In fact I've discovered that when it comes to relocating missing items, it is often much more efficient to just ask my wife to find it for me.
And likewise, no doubt, my INFP friend retreats to his bed and over-sleeps from time to time. I've no doubt of that.
INFP online friends of mine have complained that INFPs also need a lot of sleep. Maybe that's an NF thing.
And I too retreat to bed when I am very stressed, but it is for a different reason. It's about the touch. It is deeply stress releaving to me, to lay in bed with heavy covers on. Something about being touched nearly everywhere at the same time that is deeply calming. I thought you would appreciate a different perspective.
Bill
Is INFP the only type that goes crazy via DID?
According to the Temperament experts, yep! The Theorists get OCDs, and I forget what the others get. I misplaced my notes during our move and they haven't turned up yet.
Hi, this is really...scary. Insightful, too. "Inscary."
If this has some weight, maybe there's a link here between going bananas (to use the clinical term) and how each type deals with heavy stress.
For example, it's noted on this site (and my experience and observations strongly supports this) and when in the midst of conflict, INFPs seem -- from the outside, at least -- to "freeze". I've known two INFPs very well who both experienced significant, prlongued conflict situations (one domestic, one legal) and I was amazed -- in awe -- at how both types could, to a very reasonable extent, carry on with everyday, ordinary living. I don't mean that I expected them to just shut down, but I DID expect them to, at least, consolidate -- to save their limited energy for the things that they HAD to do, and drop the other 'fluff stuff.' But no, these INFPs -- despite being VERY unhappy with their situations -- still managed to carry on with small talk, with ironing, with little things that just just floored me. It was as if they could comfortably co-exist with the debilitating conflict; and it WAS debilitating, and they WEREN'T accepting it and "going beyond it" (I have no doubt of this). So perhaps DID was playing a role here -- a short-term protective one -- to keep the INFPs from imploding?
Same goes for INFJs (like me). The site points out how we need to exit conflict situations (out of fear) and 'reassess from a safe place' -- what's safer than inside? It's like going into a shell (maybe turtle is a good totem for INFJs, along with dolphin :) So perhaps the catatonia -- the onset or early phase of it -- is what drives us 'away' during conflict; that we know, instinctively, that we're going to shut down, and so we tend to arrange exits (or just force them).
Anything to this?
I am INFJ and when I am depressed I usually don't lie in bed all day, but I tend to just drift out of myself and sit staring at nothing for a very long time without any thoughts whatsoever, like you said "Elvis has left the building". I know what you mean about the unwanted sexual advances; I also seem to act in this way if two of my friends are in some sort of conflict around me, I try to leave the situation in a non-physical way (as that would be rude) and deal with it later when everyone has calmed down.
These last two comments point at some interaction style differences between INFJ and INFP.
INFPs under stress display a behavior called "freeze" or possibly "faint." It's a bit like playing possum. Mind you, they don't go away, but stay present, remain engaged, and *pretend* everything is Just Fine, even when it's awful.
INFJs under stress display a behavior called "flight." And that's a retreat of some kind. INFJs withdraw from the situation and try to formulate a plan for dealing with the problem. This is the "crawling in bed" behavior. There's an avoidance.
Both of these are forms of "masquerade," of course -- the title Eve Delunas gives Catalysts who aren't behaving authentically (usually because something valued is at stake).
Is this distinction helping....?
I'm certainly an INFJ. I don't retreat to my bed all the time when upset, but I know I have no desire or energy to really go out and do anything. My friends have forced me out before during these moments saying that "I can't just wallow - I need to go out and do something", but that doesn't really help either because I'm just in a bad mood the whole time and people will typically recognize it.
It looks like a bad way to handle things at first glance because it does look like your avoiding rather than facing it and dealing, but from experience, I've noticed is better for me to go that route than let other people force myself out. I feel that by "staying in bed" I can work on myself from the inside out and feel emotionally and mentally stronger.
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